A collection of the writings of the Saint of Calcutta show her to have been unfazed by poverty and criticism but plagued by doubts about her faith. From The Times:
On her first day in Calcutta’s slums: “At 8am Veronica [Gomes, her guide to the poor areas] and I went out. We started at Taltala and went to every Catholic family. The people were pleased but children were all over the place. And what dirt and misery, what poverty and suffering. I spoke very little: I just did some washing of sores, and dressings, gave medicine to some. The old man lying on the street – all alone sick and dying – I gave him carborsone and water, and he was so strangely grateful…
“We went to Taltala bazaar, and there was a very poor woman dying, I think of starvation more than TB. What poverty. What actual suffering. I gave something that will help her to sleep, but the woman is longing to have some care. I wonder how long she will last – [her temperature] was just 96 degrees (35.56C). She asked a few times for confession and Holy Communion. I felt my own poverty there, too, for I had nothing to give that poor woman. I did everything I could, but if I had been able to give her a hot cup of milk, her cold body would have got some life. I must try and be somewhere close to the people where I could easily get at the things.”
[An edited extract from "Mother Teresa Come Be My Light: The private writings of the Saint of Calcutta", edited by Brian Kolodiejchuk.]
